sick employee #2

Dear “Calling in sick employee #2”,

What’s that? You have a headache? By all means, stay home. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to work with a headache.

I know it’s unfair of me to expect you to work in such a fragile condition. Understand though, I was raised by a mom who burnt her eye with a curling iron one morning, and still went to work. Please don’t ask me to explain this. I fully admit at the age of 36, I don’t know how a curling iron works. Yes, this hair you see is what one would call a wash-and-go.

I also understand that you couldn’t grasp how bad this headache was, until five minutes after you were supposed to be here and just woke up. Perhaps the conversation we had yesterday when you were a half hour late to your shift, and I told you the expectation was to be here on time has something to do with this.

Feel some relief knowing there are many over the counter medicines that will help alleviate this pain for you so you can find some peace throughout your day. Don’t worry about us, I don’t even know what it’s like to work with the proper amount of staffing, it’s yet to happen in my first three weeks taking over this store. I would hate to get used to it now. Thanks for keeping the lack of attendance here consistently shitty. Feel better.

Sincerely,

Maggie